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Mothers Day Bonus

This year Mother’s Day morning was also shared with my husbands birthday so instead of the  bustle of breakfast in bed served by sticky fingers, I got up early to make confetti pancakes & give him some much deserved sleep. Not to mention I was able to sleep in until ten the previous day, after managing to coordinate a kid free night for us.
Happy girls  finish scraping the last bits  of syrup from their plates before taking off to grab their presents they have been bursting with excitement to pass out... Bags filled with handmade  cards covered in thoughtfully written declarations of love for their daddy. Then it was my turn to be showered by their creations... Hand made crafts from school by my daughter with “mom” on the front and I could tell she had tried her hardest for me...next was my step daughter who proudly handed me a bag decorated all over with hearts and flowers. The word “mom” written on top and for a second I hope that she wasn’t torn in having to decide who  to give it to.. her mom or her stepmom... but after watching her proud smile as I admire her hard work my heart feels full and hugs go all around. For me, my Mother’s Day is complete.I smile at the feeling of a hot coffee hitting my lips, appreciating that even on his birthday my husband made sure I was treated like a queen.
It was not until the next day that my husband explained to me how my step daughter had asked her teacher to make an extra gift for me. That she had made one for her mommy, but then felt sad that she didn’t have one for me. She was nervous to ask but bravely went up to her teacher and asked if she could make another one for her step mommy. Not only did the teacher allow it  but she gave her extra time to be able to color and detail her gift for me as much as her little heart desired.
That story paired with her gift has stayed  with me. Being a step mom is such an awkward and difficult role sometimes. Especially being a mom to my other two girls at the same time. There’s no rules or guide for the situations you end up in. As a mom myself, I always tried to think about how I would feel if I were in that position. Over time I realized that my worrying was causing  me to take a back seat in my role as her stepmom.. Instead of just doing things naturally, like  I do for my own, I would overthink situations and worry if I was doing it right. I realized that I wasn’t looking at things through my step daughters perspective. Her view of me is of importance and value and I was minimizing myself in her life. I knew I was important but knowing that her mom and dad are her center I felt like I wasn’t sure where I fit.
But what I learned from a decorated brown paper bag is that whatever I am doing for her, if I am confident or confused...I am doing it exactly the way I should, because in her little heart she has a spot just for me and it is exactly where I belong...
Wine is poured and my husband and I sit back and exhale letting our minds wander over the weekend of celebration we just lived through. He smiles and thanks me for making his birthday special. I admire him for a moment, feeling grateful that we chose each other. These days fly by, and sometimes they can feel so hectic but the life we have is exactly where I want to be.

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